Adolphus

When I first talked to Adolphus, he informed me "if you haven't trained with Adolphus, you haven't worked out." Adophus is an honest man.

We arrived on Saturday morning spry and ready to work out after eating a bowl of cereal and a cup of coffee. We were immediately informed that we'd likely throw up, that our food was all wrong and that there were no breaks just because this was a trial session. Ugh-oh.

Eliptical for 5 min then onto work-out for legs. Quad and leg presses, squats and lunges. Pretty grueling at first. Then, we did another set and I started wondering what we were doing there. By the third exercie, I decided it was better to be fat. By the next rotation, I wondered if I'd survive this experience. And, before we were finished, Jared and I were yelling "yes sir!" This was not personal training - it was freaking bootcamp. But, 45 minutes later, we had managed not to puke, we were headed out the door with our new diet plan and an appointment for 6am Wednesday. Me, Jared and our four "Bambi Legs" headed home.

Fast Forward One Hour: YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME. I could not get up and down out of a chair. I could not bend over in the shower. I cannot get in and out of the car without wincing. Isn't the second day supposed to be the worst pain? We survived Saturday nonetheless.

Sunday, the sabbath. I would have gone to church, but I was barely able to get out of the bed. When I did get out of the bed, I figured I'd better stay standing since it hurts like hell to get to a standing position. Forget squatting to pick anything up off the ground (ask Jared who accidently dropped something at the grocery store - we both stared at it for about a minute before working up the courage to try to squat to the ground - BIG mistake). And, we found a whole new hurdle - the toilet. How much does it cost to install handicap railings and a higher toilet?? We almost found out. Did you ever realize that the toilet is lower than a chair and requires some level of quadrecept strength to reach it? I didn't either until Sunday. Well - at least we're not working today, right? Advil and the pool should do the trick - oh, hell, we'd better just jump into the water since the stairs and ladder are out of the question.

Monday - The second day IS the worst pain. Our 92 year old founding partner is walking around the firm like a speed demon compared to me. I'm glad my chair has armrests or I'd have to stand up to work. And, thank the Lord, our bathroom has a handicapped toilet with a rail. Monday may be ok after all.

By Tuesday, the pain has decreased to a manageable level. Yay. We get to start over tomorrow. And, now we're two days into the diet and I'm getting cranky.